WITH all the hubbub over whether French or English should be Cambodia's

second language, veteran scribe, erudite historian and world-renowned linguist

Leo Dobbs would like to remind all native and would-be English speakers that,

thanks to the Norman conquest (conquête) of England after William (Guillaume)

the Conqueror's (Le Conquérant) victory (victoire) at the Battle (bataille) of

Hastings in 1066, more than ten thousand (sowzande) French words were introduced

(introduissaient) into the English language (langue).

Mr. Leo, who

mysteriously (mystérieusement) traces (trace) his own lineage (lignée) back to

Saint (Saint) Leo I (AD c400-461) - the Italian-born pope (pape) who actively

(activement) opposed (a opposé) heresy (hérésie), including Manichaeanism (Le

Manichaeanisme), Pelagianism (Le Pelagianisme), Nestorianism (Le Nestorianisme),

and Eutychianism (Le Eutychianisme) - would especially like to note (note) that

the English words culture (culture) and buffoon (bouffon) were derived from (est

derive dé) French.

For those who would like further elaboration on how

this all fits into the Cambodian equation, inquiries may be directed to Leo at

tel: 26189.

A visiting businessman passed on this definition of charity:

Bread for the world but the hot dog stays at home.

Human rights NGOs

around town have been grumbling about the UNCHR's perceived lack of enthusiasm

for getting directly involved in rights abuses cases. In reference to one Center

official, an activist commented: "He's the kind of guy who should be sitting in

a hermetically sealed office in Geneva analysing some report from Zimbabwe on

cattle production."

More grumbling. This time from the ranks at CDRI who

have been muttering about Institute rules which require men to put on ties when

they head off to visit government offices. One collared staffer wondered if this

wasn't some nefarious, western form of "neo-tie imperialism".

Of the 11

or so Danes living in Cambodia, Maja Wallengren claims to be the only one of

pure Viking stock. The evidence given was very sketchy. However, the Gecko knows

of a female Canadian journalist who was invited into Wallengren's Viking

sisterhood one drunken night at the Heart of Darkness.