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Logo of Phnom Penh Post newspaper Phnom Penh Post - The Gecko: 23 September 2005

The Gecko: 23 September 2005

The Women's Media Center of Cambodia, with support from the Danish Institute for

Human Rights, sent out invitations to the press for a Seminar on Access to

Information to be held in Sihanoukville on Sept 14. The purpose was to bring

together stakeholders to discuss how to "implement Access to Information in

Cambodia in accordance with the new law on Archives as well as the Universal

Declaration of Human Rights and other international treaties and conventions."

The press were eager to attend but their stakeholder participation was

spiked. Sessions were closed to the press and public.

** This latest

report from America: A major research institution has recently announced the

discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element has been

named "Governmentium."

Governmentium has one neutron, 12 assistant

neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 224 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an

atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces

called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles

called peons. Since Govern-mentium has no electrons, it is

inert.

However, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction

with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of Governmentium causes one

reaction to take over four days to complete, even if it would normally take less

than a second.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of four years; it

does not

decay but, instead, undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of

the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact,

Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization

will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.

This

characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists

to believe that

Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity in

concentration; this hypothetical quantity is referred to as "Critical Morass."

When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium - an element

which radiates just as much energy as the Governmentium atom since it has half

as many peons but twice as many morons.

** If you see somebody who looks

like Quincy Jones in Phnom Penh in October, that's because it's him.

**

At a recent session of the National Assembly one observer counted 26

Landcruisers, 3 Lexus, 2 Prados, 3 Pajeros and 36 sedans (ranging from Camrys to

luxury Saloons).

** Ande Stanke says the article in Chakraval Daily about

a "riverside street restaurant" that has "naked dancing foreign women remaining

underwear" is not his place, and so he asks that reporters who have been trying

to extort money from him to not write about it please stop doing so.

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