Logo of Phnom Penh Post newspaper Phnom Penh Post - The Gecko 25 , April 2003




The Gecko 25 , April 2003

The Gecko 25 , April 2003

Some new ideas are so popular they outrun their ability to keep up with market demand.

The Roast Beef sandwiches at the new Sharky Mart are a case in point, with word of

their popularity spreading so fast customers have now run into the pickle of none

available late at night. Management says they are aware of the issue, but supply

problems persist.

One Aging Bald White Guy has become so addicted to the sandwiches that he now complains

of suffering from withdrawal symptoms if he can't get an adequate daily supply.

A Tropical diplomatic source who declined to be shamed says he heard about the following

exchange with Sharky Mart staff one night around 2am.

Aging Bald White Guy, after a quick glance in the fridge: "Hey, I need one real

bad...I'm dealing with a wicked case of cold turkey here. What's the #$%&ing

deal?"

Sharky Mart Staffer, responding politely: "Cole turkey, no have. Maybe you try

smoh chicken."

Aging Bald White Guy, sweating profusely: "Hey sister, I ain't smokin' no chicken.

I'm talking about Roast Beef. I'm gonna smoke this whole shop if you guys don't get

with the program."

Sharky Mart Staffer: "Sorry, no smoking in Sharky Mart."

Aging Bald White Guy, now clearly agitated: "Oh man, don't give me that. What

about the beef?"

Sharky Mart Staffer, still calm: "Roh Bee all finish 6 o'clock. Tuna salad,

have!"

Aging Bald White Guy, grasping at non-existent hair and then gesticulating wildly:

"Tuna? Tuna? Do I look like some kind of tuna freak to you?"

Sharky Mart Staffer (after Aging Bald White Guy storms out of shop), muttering under

her breath: "Actually, you look like some kind of psycho albino porpoise on

crack, mate, but what do I know!"

An Equatorial diplomatic source who declined to be framed said he heard that a number

of irate customers had met secretly to consider a variety of drastic options.

Calling themselves "The Big Pickle on the Roast Beef Sandwich Supply Crisis

Committee", they hatched a plot to kidnap Jay Steed and hold him for ransom,

but the plan broke down when a splinter faction emerged arguing that their list of

demands had to include a regular supply of Roast Beef sandwiches on Rye AND Whole

Wheat bread.

At Post press time, it has been learned that the group has stopped meeting as they

were unable to secure a quorum. They are instead now trading accusations and insults,

and arguing over who has the legal right to use the name of the committee.

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