Scurvy boat thief sets sail for dry prison cell

One of a trio of alleged boat thieves was arrested in Kampong Chhnang town on Wednesday. Police said the three men had stolen two boats, stripped them of their engines and sold them for a little over $30. The provincial pirates then split up to look for buyers for the engines when one was apprehended by police. The suspect confessed to the crime, then made another unsolicited confession: that he had just got out jail, where he had been serving time on rape charges. The shackled sea dog is now facing a second stint in the brig. Kampuchea Thmey

Dance to the music – or attack to it, it’s all good

There men in Takeo’s Traing district were arrested on Wednesday for fighting, quite literally, for their right to party. According to police, the suspects, aged 22 to 25, were dancing at a wedding when the music suddenly stopped. The raging revellers made ready to take out their aggression on the band when the groom’s parents intervened. Further incensed, the trio allegedly turned on the couple, hacking the husband once in the head with a cleaver and beating the wife unconscious. The men escaped, but were arrested the next morning. Koh Santepheap

Picker promptly pinched over botched burglary

A Garbage picker was caught red-handed trying to collect more than recyclables in Phnom Penh’s Sen Sok district on Wednesday. Police said the suspect was pulling his cart along when he passed the home of teacher and allegedly broke in to look for valuables. To the suspect’s chagrin, the teacher showed up just in time to catch him with his hand in the cookie jar. The would-be victim detained the recyclables collector until police could arrive. Kampuchea Thmey

Motorbike theft plan was running on empty

A contruction worker’s designs to make a little extra cash sputtered and died on Thursday, much like the motorbike he had allegedly just stolen in the capital’s Russey Keo district. According to police, the man had run into a home, snatched a moto and fled, but failed to make it very far before the bike ran out of gas. Police arrested him in what might be the lowest-speed chase ever, as he was walking the bike to a gas station. Koh Santepheap

Man catches bullet for resisting moto thieves

A man who lost his motorbike in a robbery in Phnom Penh’s Meanchey district on Wednesday will be walking – with a limp – for the foreseeable future. Police said the man was driving his girlfriend when three men, one with a gun, demanded he hand over the bike. The victim scuffled with the thieves and was shot in the leg for his troubles. The suspects made off on the bike and police are now searching for them. Nokorwat

Translated by Phak Seangly