PIGS are not the best of walkers, so racing them is clearly pushing the rational to the edge of the plate. Still, the third Porkula 1 pig race was held at the X Bar on what was a devastatingly wet night last Saturday.

The goal was simply to raise funds for local NGOs – and have a blast, of course.

Local businesses and people “sponsored” a racing pig and hoped it would bring home the bacon by being the first over the finishing line.

The night featured 12 little squiggling piggies that ran the outdoor course on the bar’s rooftop venue, all the way to the finishing lines, chased by demented members of the two-legged species, the sponsors trying to urge their piglets to run faster.

The crowd bore the heavy rain bravely and, after several qualifying rounds, The Warehouse’s The Swining finally pipped wee Schnitzel at the post. The good news was that almost $1000 was raised for charities supported by the local businesses that sponsored the pigs.

“The X Bar rocks!” said a delighted Tammy Durand of ABCs & Rice. “Plus, all of the pigs are going to help poor families to start their own business.”

Durand and her colleague Matt Foot spent weeks snuffling around the highways and byways around Siem Reap, looking to buy racing piglets.

The porkers, having done their best, will now be sold at a subsidised price to families in need. This assistance will help them to sow the seeds of their own success.

The crowd at the race was given the chance to further ham things up, too, with a watermelon eating competition adding to the already exciting event.

The idea was to pig out on three massive slices of melon followed by a shot of tequila. First to finish would be declared winners – provided they didn’t vomit.

Alex from Turkey managed to keep it down to be declared the winner, despite a stellar performance by local identity Levi Semadeni.

It all made me pine for an apple martini.